Hecht & Associates is excited to make two announcements: the launch of our redesigned website which went live just a week ago and our upcoming relocation to the Rockville, MD area in April 2017.
We’ve always prided ourselves on how our family law attorneys serve and represent clients. We think the new website creates a comprehensive knowledge base for clients and those looking for information on family law services.
Our new location in Rockville will make visiting our office far more convenient and puts the firm in much greater proximity to the courthouses, attorneys and experts we work with regularly.
These are a few new beginnings – of sorts – for us and so can a divorce be one for you.
In fact, divorce is in some ways the “ultimate” new beginning. You are separating from a previous life and confronting the uncertainty of the future. While we know there can be very deep feelings of struggle and sadness in facing a new reality, this can also be a time to open yourself up to the new positive possibilities that lie ahead.
In the spirit of new beginnings, we offer these five ideas that can help jumpstart some positive changes in your life.
1. Recommit to self-improvement
A lot of people spend the majority of their time taking care of others – your kids or your spouse or other family members. You may have stopped exercising or learning new skills that can keep your mind fresh or that could help your career.
It’s time to take on some activities that put you first and help you improve your mind, body and self confidence. Here are just a few suggestions:
In the past five years, online courses have exploded in popularity and in prominence.
Top schools like Johns Hopkins, Stanford, and University of Pennsylvania are offering free courses taught by their professors in subjects ranging from business strategy, computer science, social sciences, philosophy, and many others.
Short courses can be a way to brush up on skills or get your feet wet in an area you may want to explore as a new career path. Top providers include:
• Coursera – broad subjects, with accessible content for adult learning
• Kahn Academy – learning resources for all ages, and free tools for teachers and parents to monitor progress and coach students.
• Code.org – software programming education for your inner geek!
Other resources: 50 Top Online Learning Sites
Fitness has also found a new form. Rather than going to a one size fits all gym, the fitness industry has moved to creating smaller specialty studios that focus on a few exercise philosophies.
• Soul Cycle and Zengo offer high-energy, music-driven cycling classes. Even Michelle Obama has been seen around town at Soul Cycle and others!
• Orange Theory and Blast teach different types of High Intensity Interval Training (HIIT), which is a combo of fast paced cardio and weight training.
• CrossFit studios offer another popular fitness trend that uses several different types of intense exercises meant to challenge you mentally and physically.
Many of these studios work hard to not only keep you in motivated and in shape but also foster a sense of community for their clientele, bringing people together with similar interests and goals. Added bonus – the endorphins your body produces from exercise is the best way to relieve stress and anxiety.
One studio promotes the philosophy, “If it doesn’t challenge you, it’s not changing you.” So take charge, make the change . . . you are worth it.
2. Rediscover the small things
Did you find yourself ignoring hobbies and activities you once enjoyed? Did your spouse not share your personal interests?
This is an opportunity to take up those hobbies again, pursue your interests, and begin a life that brings you joy.
Start practicing yoga; take time to read those novels you’ve been putting off; join a summer softball league; take a hike through Great Falls or Rock Creek Park. Share those interests and hobbies with your children, too. This is a good chance to expose your children to new things that you may not have been able to share during the marriage.
More than anything, it’s time to whatever small changes you need that will help to give your mind and your body a positive place to focus your attention.
3. Reconnect with people you love
Marriage sometimes draws people away from the people we most love. While not intentional, divorce is not only a time-consuming process but can create difficult divisions in friendships and family.
Make the effort to reconnect and you will more than likely be surprised at the positive reception you get. Call old friends and rearrange your schedule to spend some time with them. Make time for after-work drinks or coffee. Book a flight to visit somebody you haven’t seen in years. Mend fences if you need to.
And don’t forget family. They are your pillar for support and can provide the unconditional love you need now – use this time to lean on them to help you through the emotional journey ahead.
Most importantly, please don’t be afraid to ask for help from your support system and know there are always people in your corner.
4. Reclaim your space
Sometimes, part of getting over a relationship is getting rid of reminders of the past and creating a space that is uniquely yours. Use this as an opportunity to do some “spring cleaning” – whatever the true season.
This is not to say you have to get rid of all your old things and completely start over. But you might get rid of a few small items or update the look and feel of your space. You might replace the dishes or flatware; change up your artwork, throw pillows, get a pool table or build the “man cave” you always wanted. Or you might just clean out old junk that’s been puling up in the garage.
At the end of the day, whatever you do, it’s important to make your home feel like your very own space – a place where you feel happy and comfortable to come home to every day in your new life.
5. Renew your interest in new relationships – when you’re ready
The best advice for when to start dating again is: when the time is right. There is no right or wrong time, only when you feel comfortable.
Many people find it beneficial to first commit time to themselves and to reflect on their prior relationships before they jump back into the dating world. This can be an emotionally vulnerable time, so it’s important to make sure you truly feel ready before you start dating.
Decide if you are looking to simply date or if you want to find a new long-term partner. Consider how it will affect your children, too (if you have them) and make a conscious effort to figure out how to introduce the topic or to integrate a new partner in their lives. A professional child psychologist can provide you individualized advice on how to best approach this.
When you do start, be safe, and learn from past relationship experiences – whether those include paying attention to behaviors or patterns that you’d like to improve in a new relationship, or understanding the traits you want in a new partner that you don’t want to compromise this time around.
Divorce is a Crossroads – Choose Your Path Wisely
Divorce in and of itself is a mechanism to new beginnings. We think law firms should not stop at just protecting your legal rights. We also want clients to feel good about the major life decisions they must make in divorce proceedings. Even more importantly – even though it can be very hard to envision a new life at first, we want to give clients the strength and empowerment they need to take that giant leap into a happier and more fulfilling place.
We’re here anytime: call 301-587-2099 or visit our new website at www.hechtassociates.com